Created 2008/08/04  Modified 2009/11/17
The Boston and New England Highly Sensitive Person Group
A discussion, support and social group for HSPs in Connecticut, Maine, Massachusetts, New Hampshire,
Rhode Island and Vermont.
Am I REALLY a Highly Sensitive Person?

People sometimes feel unclear about the meaning of "sensitive." It's not surprising. There's a considerable difference between the typical definition of someone being "sensitive," and being "highly sensitive," as an inborn physiological trait.

One of the most common (mis)interpretations of a "highly sensitive person" is that it's someone who is "emotionally fragile," timid, and gets their feelings hurt at the drop of a hat. Whereas that may be true for some HSPs, it's only a small part of the picture.

A much more complete description-- and the one used on this web site, and in the New York HSP group-- was coined by research psychologist Dr. Elaine N. Aron, and formed the basis for her 1996 book, "The Highly Sensitive Person."

When Aron describes a "Highly Sensitive Person" she is talking about sensitivity as a inborn trait-- HSPs are people who have a highly attuned nervous system. The sensitivity she talks about has has not only emotional, but also psychological, physical and environmental components.

If you're interested, there's a very useful "sensitivity self test" on Dr. Aron's web site. You might find it quite eye-opening, if you have not taken it, already:

Elaine Aron's Sensitivity self-test.
High Sensitivity is a NEUTRAL trait, not an "illness" or other pathology.

There is a common misconception-- both among HSPs, as well as among people who meet someone who's sensitive-- that there is something "wrong" with the person, and that the sensitivity can be "treated" and/or "fixed." I have also run into a number of people who feel "unsure" as to whether they are really HSPs. Either the description doesn't seem to completely apply to them, or there are certain ways they feel they are very IN-sensitive, OR they feel like they are too "out there" to be a Highly Sensitive Person.

There are certain incidences in which being an HSP may not "look like" the description. One such would apply to the extraverted HSP. Approximately 25-30% of HSPs are extraverted, and they contend with both feeling dependent on the company of others to be energized, while simultaneously getting just as easily overstimulated as introverted HSPs. Similarly, Elaine Aron characterizes some HSPs as being "High Sensation Seekers" (HSS). An HSS-HSP constantly seeks out novelty, change, excitement, risk, and can seem very un-HSP like in some ways. And yet, the very variety and excitement they seek, also tends to overstimulate and exhaust them.

The important thing to understand about being Highly Sensitive is that it is neither a "defect" nor a "pathology," but merely within the normal spectrum of human experience. Of course, HSPs are just as likely to encounter challenging life situations as anyone else in the population. At such times, HSPs DO have "special needs" of their helping professionals. Please visit our HSP Counseling & Therapy page for more.
Some things High Sensitivity is NOT

There are quite a few "conditions" and "syndromes" with diagnoses that look like they somewhat overlap parts of the description of a Highly Sensitive Person.

In general, be wary of people-- mental health professionals, or just lay people, family or friends-- who seem determined to label your sensitivity as a "disorder" or "pathology." High Sensitivity is an inborn neurological trait, and not a "disorder," and thus also isn't something that can be "cured" or "treated." In most cases you'll find that the people who are trying to pathologize you are taking this approach in order to make their lives easier, not your life easier. Here are some "lookalikes" you might be presented with:

Shyness. Neither high sensitivity (nor introversion) are the same thing as shyness. Shyness occurs due to social conditioning, usually early in life, and is experientially based. Sensitivy (and introversion) are inherent traits.
Social Anxiety (Or Generalized Anxiety). Again, these are disorders while high sensitivity is a trait. Whereas an HSP may be afflicted with either of these disorders, being an HSP does NOT mean you have a disorder. Some mental health professionals claim that HSPs may be more prone to anxiety disorders, simply because they experience their environment "more intensely," and are more aware of their bodies and emotional states.

Asperger's Disorder (formerly Asperger's Syndrome). There are a lot of overlaps between the diagnostic criteria for Asperger's (a form of high-functioning autism) and the description of High Sensitivity. That said, the two are not the same, and an HSP may have Asperger's, but being an HSP doesn't mean you have the disorder. One of the primary ways to tell the two apart comes in the context of social interactions. Individuals with Asperger's generally have difficulty understanding social cues and reading such things as body language and facial expressions, while HSPs tend to be attuned to these in a much above average way.

Sensory Integration Dysfunction. Whereas this does involve the central nervous system, it essentially refers to a disorder in which a person senses physical stimuli normally, but perceives them abnormally. This is not true about being highly sensitive... whereas an HSP may feel sensory overload, he or she senses and perceives consistently. However, an HSP can have SID, just like anyone else.